We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
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