Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
