You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Sponge bath it is.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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