i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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