Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Randomize