If you die in college, do you die in real life?
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
