your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
