his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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