I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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