Who wears a wallet chain?!
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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