Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize