Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
