Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
