Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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