i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
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