I must be too annoying 4 u.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
