i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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