I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
