I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize