I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Randomize
