using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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