If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
