i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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