i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
