After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
