Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Couch. On fire.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
