If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize
