Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
