Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
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