Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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