May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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