then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize