just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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