It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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