Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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