i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
