If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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