Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Randomize
