so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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