go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
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