Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize