I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
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