Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
