honey bunches of taint.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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