I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
