i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
