I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
