I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
