I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
