I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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