Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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